Keeping going

Things are really hard here just now. Panic attack kind of hard. Crying at the drop of a hat kind of hard. Wondering how on earth I’m going to get up tomorrow and do it all again kind of hard.

I’ve tried to write about it but I can’t. I cannot find the words.

So here’s some best bits from the holidays. Some bits to remind me why I get up and do it all again.

Big swam a width in the swimming pool. We’ve gone pretty much every week for nearly 3 years and it’s been worth it. She smiled a real smile.

Little swam for the first time.

We went to the beach, dug a big hole and found a dinosaur!

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The girls have been totally awesome on their bikes. They’ve ridden on the local biking mountain track a lot this holiday and it’s amazing to see how quickly they progress.

We went to ‘fun time’ at the pool today. They were both so much more confident. Falling off the floats, giggling, trying different things out. It was lovely to watch them.

We’ve climbed a ‘mountain’ and for the first time, Little walked all the way.

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My dad taught Big how to play Battleships. They worked on a 9 square grid and one ship but she was able to work it out and played it for a good wee while with him.

Little sat for ages with my mum colouring. Then they played ‘Elsa and Anna’. Then they played ‘making cakes in the garden’ for ages.

We made a mermaid at the beach.

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Little went to a birthday party and for the first time, she went to play with all the other children. She kept waving at me and coming back for a hug occasionally but was mainly in the party.

We discovered an amazing rope swing on an adventure at the beach.

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So there’s our best bits. The bits that have given us all a smile. The bits that keep me going.

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3 thoughts on “Keeping going

  1. Really sorry to hear how tough times are right now.
    I wish that I had something useful to offer. There should be an answer for these situations. There should be a source of support that I could suggest.
    But, I really don’t have any answers.
    I hope things get better. I hope you can get a break and a boost somehow. I hope this time passes.

    Liked by 1 person

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